I am proud of you.
I am proud of you for trying, even when it hurts. It takes a lot to be the kind of person who challenges themselves to change; it takes a lot to be the kind of person who confronts all that is lost and haunted within them. I wish I could tell you when you will know, when your head will finally feel like it is floating above water, but healing is something you will never be able to time; it is something you will never be able to measure. Things will get lighter as you break up the earth within yourself. Things will get lighter as you excavate the past from your mind, when you learn how to forgive it and befriend it.
So keep taking the steps. Keep asking the questions. Keep facing the things you need to face. You are getting closer every single day, even when it does not feel that way.
